Fruitcake MIDI Forum Treasury

[The_Worminator]

Well, no-one's recreated this topic yet, so I might as well do the honours.

This current obsession with food having only natural ingredients is irritating me, for a start. First they take the blue Smarties out (naturally, I haven't bought a single pack of Smarties since), and today, upon opening a new bottle of my beloved Sainsbury's Basics cola, the drink which I've lived off for the last 5 years, I discover it tasting different, and distinctly crap. I check the label, and lo and behold, 'Only natural flavours!' has now reared its ugly head. Ugh.

Maybe, just maybe, some of us are prepared to risk whatever horrific life-threatening consequences E696942 might have in order to have a glass of cola that doesn't taste like it's passed through the digestive system of a camel.
_________________
[quote="Tommy"]Tinytim got it.
At a guess he probably stopped playing it after 5 minutes.
He said he liked to look at the instruction book as it has a man having an erection inside it.[/quote]

[Sam]

PUBLIC TRANSPORT.

I'll just copy and paste from an MSN conversation, I can't be arsed to type it again.

Sam says:
right
ok
so
I wanted to get the 4:45 bus home
a 24 turned up
Sam says:
I wanted the 53
Sam says:
there was a 53 sat across the road
the 24 left
about 5-10 minutes later
the 53 DROVE OFF
just DROVE OFF
ok
so the next 53 was at 5:05
Sam says:
so we waited for that one
Sam says:
and waited
and waited
and there were loads of people
so
at 5:15
the bus turned up
and we all crammed into it
there were no free seats
there were people standing and sitting in the aisles
and there was a traffic jam
it took us 40 minutes to get to shalford.
Sam says:
I kid you not.
and this was in an absolutely crammed bus
it was like big brother
but on a bus
it was hell


Bear in mind Guildford > Shalford usually takes under 5 minutes and Guildford > Cranleigh takes about half an hour.

Oh yeah, and it's stupidly expensive. I had to buy a single to Shamley Green, 10 minutes on the bus from where I live - £2.30. I get my haircut, and buy a single to Guildford from there, a 20 minute journey - £2.60. The journey from Guildford > Cranleigh was then £3. Single again. So I've managed to spend £7.90 on buses today. And they're crap buses anyway. I could have bought a CD or something.

[Tdlicrfthawk]

I was there too, why didn't you mention me? I got Derren Browns: Trick of the Mind Book and illegally say that I was a child when getting the bus fair for £2.35 return from Guildford.

What Buggers my Buggery is that there is no Wii consoles left to buy in store due to vast amounts of people buying them before I do.
_________________
???

http://tdlicrfthawke.wordpress.com/

[chzrm3]

[timelyminuet]

On the topic of WoW, it buggers me that all that TBO does is play WoW these days. I have yet to hear the tale of him braving the outdoors to face the impending nuclear holocaust of Massachusetts, which therin is targeting his retail copy of WoW alone so that he'll stop playing the blasted thing.

[The Kroc]

I'm buggered to the extreme of buggerdom by the fact that there are finally Wiis again in the games shop near home, and no money in my pockets to buy one. cuz its all in me pants lol
Also, being bored in the summer makes me question what the hell it was I was so eagerly waiting the summer to arrive for.

[chzrm3]

[00tinytim00]

I hate attempting to have a meal in public with four other people. Here's what happened today:

Me and some friends successfully went bowling and afterwards decided to get food. We chose Pizza Hut and went there. We arrived at two o'clock, thereabouts, and queued for a table for five. The waitress gets fed up of our incessant waiting patiently and shoves us into a booth for three people despite the huge tables nearby which they can't be bothered to clean.

In our booth, we choose to have a lunchtime buffet meal - all you can eat! - and attempt to attract a waitress. Well, I do anyway, while they banter. After five minutes, the servers deduce that the boy waving his hands and shouting "Excuse me!!!" might want something. With their attention, we order a buffet meal with two sides of cheesy garlic bread and some Pepsi. The waitress takes our order and says, "Right, then, you can help yourselves whenever you like." Fair enough, since helping yourself is the principle behind all-you-can-eat.

As it turns out, though, most of the pans are empty, making the sign saying "Constantly Replenished" look a bit lost. Eventually, they get refilled, and we finally obtain pizza. About now, we get our cheesy garlic bread. It seems, however, that whoever was cooking had taken that joke mathematical proof that 2=1 to heart. So one side of garlic bread enters the Bermuda Triangle of idiocy, and we end up having to cut up the garlic bread we have. To cap it off, we get the bill before we've even finished eating.

Now here comes the interesting part. Observe the exquisite improvised sitcom that follows...

* I work out the cost to be £6.58 per person.
* I place £10 on the table.
* Friends 1 + 2 place £10 on the table.
* Friend 3 places his share in small change on the table.
* Friend 1 reclaims his £3.42 change from the table.
* I attempt to follow suit, but am unable to collect the exact change.
* I say to Friend 2 "What if I take £4, so that I owe you the money and pay it back later?"
* Friend 2 refuses.
* I say "In that case, I'll leave my change as a tip."
* Friends 1 + 3 decide they don't deserve tips and stop me from doing so.
* At that moment, I realise that my distinctively-folded £10 note has disappeared.
* Friends 4 pays his share with a £10 note.
* I look unsuccessfully for my money.
* We slowly come to the unspoken realisation that,since no-one else came close to the table, one of us stole the money.
* I examine Friend 4's £10 note - it transpires he is trying to pay with my money, the little tit.
* Friend 4, hereafter known as Tit, acts shocked: "I just found this money in my wallet. It must have dropped in by accident."
* I wonder what kind of accident would cause a folded £10 note to drop from the middle of a table neatly into Tit's wallet.
* I decide not to confront Tit, as we're all pissed off enough at each other anyway.
* I sit uncomfortably as Friends 1-3 and Tit continue to bicker.
* I get fed up.
* I tell them I'm going and they can keep my change for themselves.
* I escape to the outside world, leaving them bickering.

They're probably still there.

If they ever invite me out again, I'm going to make up an excuse.

Bowling was good, though.

[The Kroc]

Aargh, yeah, that's happened to me too, Tim. REALLY annoying.

And, chzrm3, do you NEED a job, or is it just one of those summer jobs to get a bit of money to spend on nothing in particular? Or are you saving up for something important?

I hate having what seems to be natural insomnia. Takes me an hour or two to fall asleep.
_________________
This Deep Well

[LynkStar]

Messing up my sleep patterns. I was awake between 7:00 am yesterday and 5:30 am today, and then 7:00 this morning to now. That totals 90 minutes sleep D:
_________________
:3

[The_Worminator]

[00tinytim00]

Yeah, but we were intending to abuse the Ice Cream Factory afterwards.

[kaoskastle]

[Sam]

I hate messing up my eating AND sleeping pattern. Eating sweets and popcorn at 4 in the morning just makes you feel awful the next day.

[Lester Square]

Oh No! More Lemmings!

The first 20-or-so levels are insultingly easy, and the rest are all revoultingly difficult.
Also the scenery is boring and the music's pretty sub-par compared to the original. :(

Oh no!
_________________
~Lester Square

[kaoskastle]

[Tdlicrfthawk]

Playing Runescape and then suddenly it crashes TWICE, something to do with Java Script.
_________________
???

http://tdlicrfthawke.wordpress.com/

[Sam]

Not having Windows Vista.


My sister just got a laptop for her 18th birthday from my Grandparents, and it has Windows Vista. It's so shiny and fancy and nice.

[Banjo-Fella]

Editing three quarters of a zombie film you've spent the past two weeks, several late nights of writing, sweat, (bottles of fake) blood and €50 on, only to have the goddamn Mac you're using spontaneously combust in a horrible, ashen blaze of hard-drive corruption. Grr. Spending another day reconstructing it wasn't much fun. But it was worth it.
_________________
~Banjo-Fella

[00tinytim00]

I've recently been hating the fact that when you meet people's expectations, you don't get rewarded - instead, they raise their expectations and punish you if you don't meet those. General example: Part of your weekly routine is to tidy your bedroom. One day you do it and tell your parents. They say "Excellent. Now hoover it." If you do that, they say "Now hoover the landing." They'd have done it themselves without complaint or hatred if it wasn't for you doing what they ask of you, but now if you don't hoover, they'll punish you for not giving them an excuse to watch TV all day.

Gahh.

[LynkStar]

My parents appreciate it when I do stuff like that because they compare me to my brother, who doesn't do anything.
_________________
:3

[00tinytim00]

Something else annoying me is the way people don't switch off the hoover at the hoover, but rather at the plug. So I plug the vacuum cleaner in, switch on the plug, and the hoover bursts into life and goes
RRGAAHGRAGAARGHAHHAAAHRAAARGGAHGARG
and I fall over.

[The_Worminator]

Noticing that I've now got 62 friends on Myspace instead of 63, but not being able to figure out who it was.

I thought Upsi had been a mangy cur and deleted me because I noticed his picture had gone, then I realised he's the MS Paint tortoise thing.

And the current British summer. Global warming isn't being encouraged nearly enough.
_________________
[quote="Tommy"]Tinytim got it.
At a guess he probably stopped playing it after 5 minutes.
He said he liked to look at the instruction book as it has a man having an erection inside it.[/quote]

[LynkStar]

[Lester Square]